I have a confession to make... I read Dear Abby. (Man it feels good to get that out in the open.) I have been reading Abby's popular advice column for several years though I'm not really sure when, or even why, I started reading it. Maybe it's just a way for me to be reminded of how blessed my life really is, and that there are so many who have it way worse than me and my "problems."
I am sharing an excerpt from one of her recent columns because it really holds a powerful truth. As someone in a leadership role in a growing church, I am always looking for ideas and ways to make things more welcoming for those who attend our weekend services. So when I read this, it really grabbed my attention. I love Abby's answer.
DEAR ABBY: I am writing about a change I have seen in church. I accept the loud guitar music and informal settings, although I do miss the traditional hymns and formal altars.
What I cannot get used to is the forced "friendly" greeting and handshaking. I attend church to meditate and worship with my family. I do not go to shake hands with strangers and give them a greeting dictated by a pastor.
I like people. I am naturally caring, outgoing and friendly. However, I believe that a greeting or handshake should come from my own heart.
I have mentioned this to friends and family from all faiths, ages and walks of life. None of them like this scheduled "greeting" either. Many say they head for the restroom at that time, turn their backs or just shake hands with the people they came with, come to church late to avoid it, or don't come at all. Others feel the practice is unsanitary.
I suggest that church leaders take an anonymous poll and ask how many in their congregations agree with me. What do you think, Abby? -- MINISTER'S DAUGHTER, CAYUCOS, CALIF.
DEAR DAUGHTER: Thank you for asking my opinion. Here it is: Something is wrong in our fragmented society if, for one moment in a house of God, people cannot find it in their hearts to reach out and make sure that everyone feels included and welcome. And for those who fear it is unsanitary -- bring small bottles of hand sanitizer.
I think Abby has a little preacher in her. What a great reminder that it's not about what we like or what makes us comfortable. Let's get outside of ourselves and make people feel welcome, even when it's a bit "unsanitary."
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
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3 comments:
AMEN!!! And just so everyone knows... This is one of my favorite parts of the service. Sometimes it's the only hug I get in the day! I love to meet the new people in our church, smile at them and welcome them. Why on earth would anyone want to go to a church that ignores them and refuses to reach out to the human race? Could we really be this selfish? Nathan - I think you might like this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9slMlrBHgjs It's not very "Christian" but it's pretty funny.
Wow! You read Dear Abby?
It's about time to revoke you Man Card.
BTW, I'm going to go write Dear Abby about worship pastors who give me the "traffic finger".......
Sometimes, yes it is a bit uncomfortable for me, but I probably wouldn't introduce myself to as many people if this time wasn't set aside specifically for greeting newcomers. I tend to be a little timid when meeting new people so this is a great exercise in being comfortably uncomforatble for me.
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